Teeth, Trannies, Thailand! – The Amazing Race Recap
Ande

By: Ande Dagan

The five remaining teams stayed in Thailand for this glorious Easter miracle of an episode of The Amazing Race. Racers flew from Phuket to Bangkok and headed to a shanti town where old boats go to die. Here in boat heaven, the teams received their Road Block task – attach a propellor to a long tailed boat. Seemed easy enough to all participants except Victor, who’s Harvard Law educated hands had only ever clutched junior high orchestra wind instruments and LSAT prep books and had no idea what to do with a wrench.

Onto the Detour, where the two tasks were so beautiful, so brilliant, so incredible, that I shed a tear knowing there would never be anything this wonderful on reality TV ever again. The teams had to choose between fitting fake dentures into the mouths of toothless Thai hobos or riding through the streets of Bangkok in a mini-van filled with Thai trannies while engaging in a raucus round of karaoke. Everybody wins!

Sinister Deaf Kid and Bionic Mom dominated every task of the episode and were the first to cross the finish line. Kisha and Jen tied Tammy and Victor at the finish line but were sent away by Phil to chase down their bags which were on the other side of town. Luckily Crackle and Pop endured yet ANOTHER penalty for not following directions. They were given two two-hour penalties for twice paying for cab rides with their own posessions – gummy bears, a pookah shell necklace with a gold shihtzu tooth, autographed pictures of various Garbage Pail Kids – instead of using local currency. Kisha and Jen made it back in time to finish fourth. Crackle and Pop were spared by yet another Easter miracle – a non-elimination round and will have to undergo a Speed Bump in next week’s episode. Next week – b*tch fight between SDK and Jen!